[slothy]

Attitude (n.)

That personality trait that worsens in the partner you mentored who now thinks he is better than you.

[mtvesuvius]

DONT (abbr.)

A convention that comes with instructions for use in it's acronym.

[slothy]

Backward finesse (n.)

The finesse of the ten that your partner unnecessarily took and the only reason you can think he did so was because he is retarded.

[slothy]

Blank (n. adj.)

The look on your partner's face when you explain to the palooka that the only way you could have set the contract was if he let the queen run round to your stiff king.

[slothy]

Board (n. adj.)

The ennui one feels after playing a hand of bridge with someone who has as much intelligence as a lobotomised tadpole.

[slothy]

Bust (n.)

A very weak hand a woman keeps close to her very large chest.

[slothy]

'Coup without a name' (.n)

[slothy]

Defense (n.)

That thing upon which de partner always sits when an important counter-play has to be made

[slothy]

Discovery play (n.)

A play intended to obtain information about the location of outstanding cards that your partner always seems to discover in the bar after the match.

[slothy]

Peter (v. and n.)

The name of your favourite BBO partner who you love to play with as he is your age, has your sense of humour and your attitude towards bridge, and then one day you find out it's actually a 73 year old woman called Gertrude who has 9 cats and she also logs in as Paul, Barry, Frank and Tom; your 4 other favourite partners.

[slothy]

Go Down (v.)

[the hog]

slothy, on Jun 15 2009, 09:26 AM, said:

Board (n. adj.)

The ennui one feels after playing a hand of bridge with someone who has as much intelligence as a lobotomised tadpole.

Be careful Slothy. Some posters have aleady said they enjoy playing with themselves.

[hanp]

Ruffian

The ♠2.

[Feegle]

Submarine squeeze

An advanced declarer play technique my partner uses whilst playing a grand slam.

[Feegle]

Ainsworth

The length of time it takes to get served in a camera shop.
Hence, also, how long we will have to wait for the abolition of income tax or the Second Coming.

from 'The Deeper Meaning of Liff' Douglas Adams & John Lloyd

[slothy]

Striped-tail ape double (n.)

A X made by partner resulting in opponents playing in 4SXX+2 which proves beyond any doubt that your partner is the missing link between ourselves and other primates

[slothy]

Acol (n.)

A bidding system i swear by with a partner I swear at.

[slothy]

Rectifying The Count (v.)

The act of reducing the number of players at the table by 1 by telling your partner to leave so that you can actually have a decent game of bridge.

[slothy]

Squeeze Without The Count (n.)

A squeeze executed by your partner where he failed to count the number of tricks he had to accumulate to make the contract.

[slothy]

Stop (v.)

1. a quiet exclamation to inform the opponents of a skip-bid warning;
2. a more vociferous exclamation to one's partner encapsulating quite accurately what you believe he should do with his bridge.