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Another fantastically STUPID lead of EXACTLY the same kind as in the previous post. Here, it not only:
Gives away the whole spade suit,
Gives away a crucial tempo, and
Fails to set up hearts,
But it ALSO allows me to catch his "partner" East in a pop-up squeeze and take TWELVE tricks.
What is it with these total I.D.I.O.T.S. that compels them to ADORE insane leads like queen from QX? I guess it would have been WAY too difficult for this C.R.E.T.I.N.O.U.S GIBBO trout to lead a HEART...from his SIX-bagger like any raw BEGINNER would do.
Instead the GENIUS found his imbecilic spade lead, thereby EARNING himself yet ANOTHER well-deserved complete ZERO to add to his countless BULGING "trophy" cases FILLED with memorabilia of his world-famed constant failures.
GIBBO is an embarrassment to the game of bridge.
https://www.bridgeba...D2%7Cpc%7CHQ%7C
Benellis58 GIB bashing on repeat Groundhog Day
#2202
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- Joined: 2022-July-07
Posted Yesterday, 12:25
Although much of this might have been irrelevant, since we would have been better off competing in diamonds, let's look at some of North's ridiculous "defensive" plays.
At trick three, he pitches a diamond on my high queen of clubs, which is fine. But why, from KQ753, does he pitch the THREE, considering that they supposedly play standard signals? Answer: In reality, they rarely if ever signal, rarely if ever WATCH or act on pard's signals, and basically treat all spot cards as interchangeable equals...all of which are among the countless reasons that they rank with the absolutely WORST "bridge players" who have ever SOILED the game by their very presence.
At trick four, he ruffs my next club play. Fine. Normal. But why on EARTH does he then play a HEART at trick five?
At trick six, declarer East calls for dummy West's spade two. Not a single spade has yet been played by anyone, so all thirteen are still in the game. North has J974. He follows, in SECOND seat, with the JACK! The old second hand HIGH play so beloved (and so awesomely stupid) by his immediate predecessors, the scintillatingly inept GIB robots. Lorserker made some MILD, LIMITED improvements within the past year, including REMOVING this farcical second hand HIGH "strategy", but obviously it sometimes resurfaces, as it did here, with this typically fleabrained play by Superstooge.
At trick eight, declarer East calls for dummy's last spade, the 8. North has two spades left: the 7 and the 9. In a burst of CLASSIC stupidity, imbecility, and Marx Brothers COMEDY, he plays the...SEVEN. As the cliché goes, you CANNOT make this stuff up.
At trick ten, declarer calls for dummy West's diamond 4. North's remaining diamonds at this point are the KQ75. Declarer is known to hold a stiff diamond by this point, so North's play is irrelevant, but COMICALLY he very CAREFULLY covers the 4 with his 5. This is the SAME North who two tricks earlier FAILED to cover dummy's EIGHT when he had only two spades left: the NINE and the SEVEN.
Whether or not their "defensive" plays end up costing, these braindead GIBBO blockheads are almost ALWAYS making absurd, nonsensical plays that reveal what utter garbage they are.
https://www.bridgeba...H8%7Cpc%7CDT%7C
At trick three, he pitches a diamond on my high queen of clubs, which is fine. But why, from KQ753, does he pitch the THREE, considering that they supposedly play standard signals? Answer: In reality, they rarely if ever signal, rarely if ever WATCH or act on pard's signals, and basically treat all spot cards as interchangeable equals...all of which are among the countless reasons that they rank with the absolutely WORST "bridge players" who have ever SOILED the game by their very presence.
At trick four, he ruffs my next club play. Fine. Normal. But why on EARTH does he then play a HEART at trick five?
At trick six, declarer East calls for dummy West's spade two. Not a single spade has yet been played by anyone, so all thirteen are still in the game. North has J974. He follows, in SECOND seat, with the JACK! The old second hand HIGH play so beloved (and so awesomely stupid) by his immediate predecessors, the scintillatingly inept GIB robots. Lorserker made some MILD, LIMITED improvements within the past year, including REMOVING this farcical second hand HIGH "strategy", but obviously it sometimes resurfaces, as it did here, with this typically fleabrained play by Superstooge.
At trick eight, declarer East calls for dummy's last spade, the 8. North has two spades left: the 7 and the 9. In a burst of CLASSIC stupidity, imbecility, and Marx Brothers COMEDY, he plays the...SEVEN. As the cliché goes, you CANNOT make this stuff up.
At trick ten, declarer calls for dummy West's diamond 4. North's remaining diamonds at this point are the KQ75. Declarer is known to hold a stiff diamond by this point, so North's play is irrelevant, but COMICALLY he very CAREFULLY covers the 4 with his 5. This is the SAME North who two tricks earlier FAILED to cover dummy's EIGHT when he had only two spades left: the NINE and the SEVEN.
Whether or not their "defensive" plays end up costing, these braindead GIBBO blockheads are almost ALWAYS making absurd, nonsensical plays that reveal what utter garbage they are.
https://www.bridgeba...H8%7Cpc%7CDT%7C
#2203
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Posted Yesterday, 12:42
North demonstrates that calling him a M.O.R.O.N. is probably a compliment to him, because I suspect that your average M.O.R.O.N., I.D.I.O.T., or imbecile is CONSIDERABLY more intelligent than a GIBBO robot.
The useless, ignorant, piece of dirt commits a ludicrous 6D call, even though his "own" GIB definition says the call shows "13+ total points". Where, may I ask, are the "13+ total points" in 72, K8643, KQ84, 42?
WHERE???
And note that the slimebag JUMPED...TWO levels for this FELONY, LEAPING to SIX diamonds over South's FOUR clubs.
The first time I ever played a robot game was nine years ago. For two or three years before that, multiple bridge friends had told me of how rotten and hopeless the GIB (in pre-GIBBO days) robots were. I see that my friends were NOT telling me lies!
https://www.bridgeba...HT%7Cmc%7C11%7C
The useless, ignorant, piece of dirt commits a ludicrous 6D call, even though his "own" GIB definition says the call shows "13+ total points". Where, may I ask, are the "13+ total points" in 72, K8643, KQ84, 42?
WHERE???
And note that the slimebag JUMPED...TWO levels for this FELONY, LEAPING to SIX diamonds over South's FOUR clubs.
The first time I ever played a robot game was nine years ago. For two or three years before that, multiple bridge friends had told me of how rotten and hopeless the GIB (in pre-GIBBO days) robots were. I see that my friends were NOT telling me lies!
https://www.bridgeba...HT%7Cmc%7C11%7C
#2204
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Posted Yesterday, 12:46
Another bad lead. Another bad "defence" Another complete zero for Frick and Frack.
https://www.bridgeba...ST%7Cmc%7C11%7C
https://www.bridgeba...ST%7Cmc%7C11%7C
#2205
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Posted Yesterday, 12:58
Why is the imbecile in the North bidding 3NT after I superaccepted his transfer to SPADES? Luckily I saw through his wafer-thin veneer of decency. I usually do, since I have NO respect ("No respect at all", as the immortal comic genius Rodney Dangerfield would have said) for THIS GIBBO robot or ANY other GIBBO robot. Without exception, they are all trash that should long ago have been tossed into a GRINDER and replaced.
https://www.bridgeba...DT%7Cmc%7C10%7C
https://www.bridgeba...DT%7Cmc%7C10%7C
#2206
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Posted Yesterday, 13:14
The usual GIBBO stupidity: There is absolutely no reason for East to lead the ENEMY suit (clubs) rather than his "partner's" suit (diamonds).
https://www.bridgeba...CCQ%7Cmc%7C9%7C
https://www.bridgeba...CCQ%7Cmc%7C9%7C
#2207
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Posted Yesterday, 13:33
West wins his spade king at trick two, so at trick three he of COURSE returns a SPADE, because it MUST be right to return the suit DECLARER is playing.
East wins his heart king at trick four, so at trick five he of COURSE returns a HEART, because it MUST be right to return the suit DECLARER is playing.
Yet ANOTHER complete zero for Frick and Frack.
Seriously, has ANYONE...EVER seen even a SINGLE human player as consistently awful as the repulsive GIBBO robots? I, for one, have not. Oh yes, I've seen lots of bad human players, but NONE as bad as the GIBBO clan. None. EVER.
https://www.bridgeba...CK%7Cpc%7CCA%7C
East wins his heart king at trick four, so at trick five he of COURSE returns a HEART, because it MUST be right to return the suit DECLARER is playing.
Yet ANOTHER complete zero for Frick and Frack.
Seriously, has ANYONE...EVER seen even a SINGLE human player as consistently awful as the repulsive GIBBO robots? I, for one, have not. Oh yes, I've seen lots of bad human players, but NONE as bad as the GIBBO clan. None. EVER.
https://www.bridgeba...CK%7Cpc%7CCA%7C
#2208
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Posted Yesterday, 14:02
Imbecilic spade lead. Yes, I fooled him by operating - first with my 1NT opening, and then with my 2D (!) response to Stayman...but if he was GOING to lead a major because of the auction, why would he not lead his FIVE-card heart suit rather than his TWO-card spade suit?
Then, HILARIOUSLY, after East wins his offside club king, he actually returns his partner's "suit", which is something that the execrable GIBBO robots normally (and stupidly) HATE to do. What's FUNNY is that HERE...on this VERY rare occasion where he actually deigns to return his partner's "suit", it is GLARINGLY obvious that spades is most definitely NOT his partner's suit! West led the TEN of spades, yet the NINE is visible in dummy! Consequently, ANY actual BRIDGE PLAYER would instantly realize that the 10 had been (perversely) led from shortness, because it was quite obviously NOT from any sequence!
At trick eight, I call for the 6 of diamonds from dummy's KJ6 tripleton. The ONLY diamond previously played on this hand was the 2, which West had pitched on a heart at trick five, so 12 diamonds now remain in the deck. East has the Q84 tripleton. He plays the...QUEEN! Yes, second hand HIGH once AGAIN rears its ugly, illogical, downright STUPID head. My diamonds (from the beginning, and still at this point) were A9 doubleton. West's remaining diamonds were 10753. so on my OWN steam, I could only EVER have taken TWO diamond tricks, but after this I.D.I.O.T.'S totally BRAINDEAD second hand HIGH play of popping the queen, I instantly had THREE guaranteed diamond winners!
The constant and STUNNING ignorance of these contemptible, sickening GIBBO pieces of garbage knows NO bounds. They absolutely REEK!
https://www.bridgeba...HJ%7Cpc%7CHA%7C
Then, HILARIOUSLY, after East wins his offside club king, he actually returns his partner's "suit", which is something that the execrable GIBBO robots normally (and stupidly) HATE to do. What's FUNNY is that HERE...on this VERY rare occasion where he actually deigns to return his partner's "suit", it is GLARINGLY obvious that spades is most definitely NOT his partner's suit! West led the TEN of spades, yet the NINE is visible in dummy! Consequently, ANY actual BRIDGE PLAYER would instantly realize that the 10 had been (perversely) led from shortness, because it was quite obviously NOT from any sequence!
At trick eight, I call for the 6 of diamonds from dummy's KJ6 tripleton. The ONLY diamond previously played on this hand was the 2, which West had pitched on a heart at trick five, so 12 diamonds now remain in the deck. East has the Q84 tripleton. He plays the...QUEEN! Yes, second hand HIGH once AGAIN rears its ugly, illogical, downright STUPID head. My diamonds (from the beginning, and still at this point) were A9 doubleton. West's remaining diamonds were 10753. so on my OWN steam, I could only EVER have taken TWO diamond tricks, but after this I.D.I.O.T.'S totally BRAINDEAD second hand HIGH play of popping the queen, I instantly had THREE guaranteed diamond winners!
The constant and STUNNING ignorance of these contemptible, sickening GIBBO pieces of garbage knows NO bounds. They absolutely REEK!
https://www.bridgeba...HJ%7Cpc%7CHA%7C
#2209
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Posted Yesterday, 14:13
South's sequence clearly shows at least 6 clubs and 5 spades. But according to the typically hopeless, pathetic GIB definition, it shows "5+ clubs...4-card clubs...rebiddable spades" instead of correctly, easily, and SIMPLY writing "6+ clubs, 5+ spades".
It starts OFF almost okay with "5+ clubs". If it instead said "6+ clubs", I would remove the "almost", because it WOULD be okay.
But then...it HILARIOUSLY says "4-card clubs", so in the SAME definition, in the space of a mere few words, he has MAGICALLY gone from having five or more clubs to NOW having exactly FOUR clubs! Was MAGIC involved? Did he have one or more clubs STOLEN at gunpoint? OR...is this merely PROOF that no one EVER bothered verifying or proofreading the always LOUSY GIB definitions? And note that it doesn't explain what "rebiddable" spades are. Does it EVER? If so, I have never seen it.
As one would expect, the lead is a stupid one. Hey, it's GIBBO , after all!
https://www.bridgeba...CHT%7Cmc%7C9%7C
It starts OFF almost okay with "5+ clubs". If it instead said "6+ clubs", I would remove the "almost", because it WOULD be okay.
But then...it HILARIOUSLY says "4-card clubs", so in the SAME definition, in the space of a mere few words, he has MAGICALLY gone from having five or more clubs to NOW having exactly FOUR clubs! Was MAGIC involved? Did he have one or more clubs STOLEN at gunpoint? OR...is this merely PROOF that no one EVER bothered verifying or proofreading the always LOUSY GIB definitions? And note that it doesn't explain what "rebiddable" spades are. Does it EVER? If so, I have never seen it.
As one would expect, the lead is a stupid one. Hey, it's GIBBO , after all!
https://www.bridgeba...CHT%7Cmc%7C9%7C
#2210
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Posted Yesterday, 23:47
A truly wretched "defence" by Johnny Halfwit and Donald J. Dumbo:
After cashing his two top hearts in the first two tricks, Johnny knows that Donnie will be ruffing the third round. Johnny knows that he then wants Donnie to play a club, so, with the 63 of hearts being his two remaining ones, Johnny should lead the THREE, his LOWER one, as a suit preference signal (since the robots SUPPOSEDLY play standard signals ...although it's closer to REALITY to say that the ignorant saps play NO signals). In any case, at trick three, Halfwit, being a typical GIBBO piece of trash, returns the WRONG heart, the 6. Dumbo ruffs and...cashes the ace of spades (I.D.I.O.T. that he is). Now, it's true that Halfwit returned the WRONG heart, thereby giving the WRONG signal (Hey, it's what they DO!), but Dumbo probably wasn't watching anyway, and looking at THAT dummy, it is VERY hard to believe that cashing the spade ace can be right.
Then, at trick five, after EW have taken all four of the first four tricks, Dumbo makes the INSANE play of a diamond. I win dummy's 7, play another diamond back to my hand, cash the spade king that Dumbo so kindly established for me, and play a third round of diamonds to dummy's ace, pulling all enemy trumps in the process. I then CASH...THREE more spades, pitching ALL THREE clubs from my hand. (Thanks again for setting up the ENTIRE SPADE SUIT for me, Donnieboy!). I end up with NINE tricks! These two jabronis didn't get EITHER of their TWO (or maybe even three) TOP CLUB TRICKS. This was QUITE a "defence" even for two total misfits like Halfwit and Dumbo.
https://www.bridgeba...CST%7Cmc%7C9%7C
After cashing his two top hearts in the first two tricks, Johnny knows that Donnie will be ruffing the third round. Johnny knows that he then wants Donnie to play a club, so, with the 63 of hearts being his two remaining ones, Johnny should lead the THREE, his LOWER one, as a suit preference signal (since the robots SUPPOSEDLY play standard signals ...although it's closer to REALITY to say that the ignorant saps play NO signals). In any case, at trick three, Halfwit, being a typical GIBBO piece of trash, returns the WRONG heart, the 6. Dumbo ruffs and...cashes the ace of spades (I.D.I.O.T. that he is). Now, it's true that Halfwit returned the WRONG heart, thereby giving the WRONG signal (Hey, it's what they DO!), but Dumbo probably wasn't watching anyway, and looking at THAT dummy, it is VERY hard to believe that cashing the spade ace can be right.
Then, at trick five, after EW have taken all four of the first four tricks, Dumbo makes the INSANE play of a diamond. I win dummy's 7, play another diamond back to my hand, cash the spade king that Dumbo so kindly established for me, and play a third round of diamonds to dummy's ace, pulling all enemy trumps in the process. I then CASH...THREE more spades, pitching ALL THREE clubs from my hand. (Thanks again for setting up the ENTIRE SPADE SUIT for me, Donnieboy!). I end up with NINE tricks! These two jabronis didn't get EITHER of their TWO (or maybe even three) TOP CLUB TRICKS. This was QUITE a "defence" even for two total misfits like Halfwit and Dumbo.
https://www.bridgeba...CST%7Cmc%7C9%7C
#2211
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Posted Yesterday, 23:59
South opens 1D and later doubles 2D, showing...DUH...good diamonds, yet West (a GIBBO robot, of course)...then invites game in...NO TRUMP...with his "diamond stopper" of 975 tripleton!
News Flash: These perpetual GIBBO imbeciles have NO IDEA what they're doing.
What's that you say? It's NOT a news flash? The whole world already knew that? By golly, upon reflection I think you're correct. Sorry.
The two braindead twits stumble into 4S and go down two.
https://www.bridgeba...CJ%7Cpc%7CH9%7C
News Flash: These perpetual GIBBO imbeciles have NO IDEA what they're doing.
What's that you say? It's NOT a news flash? The whole world already knew that? By golly, upon reflection I think you're correct. Sorry.
The two braindead twits stumble into 4S and go down two.
https://www.bridgeba...CJ%7Cpc%7CH9%7C
#2213
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Posted Today, 02:28
East goes out of his way to help his partner West with the opening lead. He does this by doubling North's Stayman bid to show that he wants a club lead. SO of COURSE West leads a ...HEART.
How to terminate a partnership in one easy lesson: Course given by Professor GIBBO at The University of the Worst Bridge You Have Ever Seen, Downtown Campus. Cheap tuition fees, though!
https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/mr3efasa
How to terminate a partnership in one easy lesson: Course given by Professor GIBBO at The University of the Worst Bridge You Have Ever Seen, Downtown Campus. Cheap tuition fees, though!
https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/mr3efasa
#2215
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Posted Today, 09:32
West, a GIBBO robot who SEES the dummy, makes a TRULY stupid shift to a HEART at trick two? Why does the worthless piece of trash make such a stupid shift? Simple: Because he's a GIBBO robot...a clueless, despicable dolt with no idea how to play bridge.
https://www.bridgeba...CC8%7Cmc%7C9%7C
https://www.bridgeba...CC8%7Cmc%7C9%7C
#2216
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Posted Today, 11:05
Our result was fine...but the GIBBO bidding was not. What a shock - NOT! GIBBO bidding is RARELY "fine", because GIBBO has VERY little intelligence about ANYTHING related to bridge. GIBBO stinks. Let's look at some of the nonsense in this auction.
North's negative double of 1H: Yes, I see that he has the requisite four spades...but I also see that he has an opening bid and seven very decent clubs. Why not begin with 2C to actually start showing his HAND?!
4NT: How will Blackwood tell North what he needs to know, given that he lacks both a first and second round control in diamonds, has a heart VOID, and knows from the auction that SOME of my values are in HEARTS?
5C: This was MY bid. You might be thinking "That twit Ben doesn't even know how to respond to Blackwood, because he showed zero or three key cards, but he actually has one." I can see why you might think that, but you would be wrong. I am WELL aware that in the foolish, antiquated, pathetic Blackwood response structure that GIBBO saddles its hopeless robots and INNOCENT humans with, 5C stupidly shows zero or three keys and 5D stupidly shows one or four. The reverse (5C = 1 or 4, 5D = zero or 3) is a FAR better (and more MODERN) way to play, but GIBBO lacks the sense to realize that. I purposely LIED with my response of 5C! Why? First, because I was aware that my GIBBO "partner", like ALL GIBBO robots, was and is a raving lunatic who has NO idea how to play bridge and often goes off the rails in some braindead quest for the often impossible dream of some wild-eyed, pie in the sky slam. I was and am also aware that GIBBO robots are so blindingly, disgustingly stupid that they make unprepared bids without thinking of what the future may bring. My "correct" response to the jerk's ill-advised Blackwood bid would have been 5D, showing - in their pathetic, outdated, illogical structure one or four keys. BUT since Superstooge in the North lacks even the LIMITED intelligence to consider what might happen, if I "correctly" bid five DIAMONDS, we would ALREADY have bypassed five CLUBS...and would have to go to SIX clubs, very possibly off two keys, since Superstooge might easily have been IGNORANT enough to not be prepared for my having only one key. In fact, you will notice that on this very hand we actually WERE missing two keys (!!!) - two ACES (!!!) - so Superstooge (a typical GIBBO I.D.I.O.T. and piece of TOTAL trash) had committed a RIDICULOUS unprepared auction with his STUPID Blackwood bid. Luckily, one of the TWO (!) ACES (!) that we were missing was in hearts, where the jerk was void, but we COULD...EASILY... have been missing two CASHABLE aces, because I could EASILY have had the HEART ace rather than the DIAMOND ace. Don't forget that I had bid 3NT, promising a heart stopper! It happened to be the king, but it could just as easily have been the ace!
Playing with a DECENT partner, I would not have lied, because I would have faith that a DECENT partner - unlike a delusional, dimwitted, piece of trash GIBBO robot - would not be so blindingly, offensively STUPID as to make an UNPREPARED Blackwood bid. Note also that this very hand illustrates EXACTLY why the "1430" Blackwood response structure is VASTLY superior to the hopeless, ANTIQUATED "0314" nonsense that GIBBO is ignorant and old-fashioned enough to FOIST on its users. GIBBO stinks.
5NT: Let's continue our tour through the sick, twisted, perverse labyrinth of GIBBO's "thinking". Given that I purposely LIED (and you can see from the preceding paragraphs exactly WHY I lied, playing with a braindead GIBBO imbecile as my "partner"!), Superstooge now thinks that I have zero or three keys, which is what my untruthful (but VERY well-reasoned) 5C response showed. He himself has two keys (plus - PERVERSELY, given his ridiculous Blackwood bid - a heart void). 5NT asks for specific kings...BUT...since our agreed suit is CLUBS, the LOWEST strain of all, IF South has a side king (or kings), it (or they) will obviously be in a higher strain, and he will have to go BEYOND 6C to show it, which COULD be a problem. In fact, he would probably NOT go beyond 6C (and as you will soon see, despite having TWO kings, I did NOT show either - which is apparently FINE with GIBBO, since the GIB definition of my 6C response to 5NT was "No king below clubs (!)", which means that his ludicrous 5NT call would NEVER solicit information about kings anyway! But beyond that issue, let's return to the fact that North assumes (thanks to my purposely false response to 4NT) that I have zero or three keys. If I have zero, we are ALREADY too high, so presumably he is working on the assumption that I have three...or else he would PASS 5C! But if I do have three, it's pointless for him to ask for kings. Why? Because for sure we will have no club (trump) losers in our known fit of at least 11 cards with his KING and my presumed ace. We will have no heart losers, because he is void. We will have no DIAMOND losers because my presumed ace will cover ONE of his two diamonds and my presumed HEART ace will cover his other diamond. We might POSSIBLY have a THIRD-round spade loser, but at this elevated level of the auction, and with GIBBO's antiquated, inept, PRIMITIVE bidding system, 5NT will NOT provide any elucidation on the subject...so...if he's playing me for ZERO keys he should PASS 5C, and if he's playing me for THREE, he might as well just leap to 7C and hope that there is no spade loser. Thus, his 5NT call is useless.
6C : Despite having TWO kings, I very wisely bid (only!) 6C. Note that from North's perspective, thinking that I had zero or three keys, we might STILL be cold for a grand, but NOW he passed. That was GOOD news, but it was also inconsistent with his 5NT call.
6C was, of course, cold...but ONLY because I had the "right" ace, diamonds, not hearts!
GIBBO rots.
https://www.bridgeba...D5%7Cmc%7C12%7C
North's negative double of 1H: Yes, I see that he has the requisite four spades...but I also see that he has an opening bid and seven very decent clubs. Why not begin with 2C to actually start showing his HAND?!
4NT: How will Blackwood tell North what he needs to know, given that he lacks both a first and second round control in diamonds, has a heart VOID, and knows from the auction that SOME of my values are in HEARTS?
5C: This was MY bid. You might be thinking "That twit Ben doesn't even know how to respond to Blackwood, because he showed zero or three key cards, but he actually has one." I can see why you might think that, but you would be wrong. I am WELL aware that in the foolish, antiquated, pathetic Blackwood response structure that GIBBO saddles its hopeless robots and INNOCENT humans with, 5C stupidly shows zero or three keys and 5D stupidly shows one or four. The reverse (5C = 1 or 4, 5D = zero or 3) is a FAR better (and more MODERN) way to play, but GIBBO lacks the sense to realize that. I purposely LIED with my response of 5C! Why? First, because I was aware that my GIBBO "partner", like ALL GIBBO robots, was and is a raving lunatic who has NO idea how to play bridge and often goes off the rails in some braindead quest for the often impossible dream of some wild-eyed, pie in the sky slam. I was and am also aware that GIBBO robots are so blindingly, disgustingly stupid that they make unprepared bids without thinking of what the future may bring. My "correct" response to the jerk's ill-advised Blackwood bid would have been 5D, showing - in their pathetic, outdated, illogical structure one or four keys. BUT since Superstooge in the North lacks even the LIMITED intelligence to consider what might happen, if I "correctly" bid five DIAMONDS, we would ALREADY have bypassed five CLUBS...and would have to go to SIX clubs, very possibly off two keys, since Superstooge might easily have been IGNORANT enough to not be prepared for my having only one key. In fact, you will notice that on this very hand we actually WERE missing two keys (!!!) - two ACES (!!!) - so Superstooge (a typical GIBBO I.D.I.O.T. and piece of TOTAL trash) had committed a RIDICULOUS unprepared auction with his STUPID Blackwood bid. Luckily, one of the TWO (!) ACES (!) that we were missing was in hearts, where the jerk was void, but we COULD...EASILY... have been missing two CASHABLE aces, because I could EASILY have had the HEART ace rather than the DIAMOND ace. Don't forget that I had bid 3NT, promising a heart stopper! It happened to be the king, but it could just as easily have been the ace!
Playing with a DECENT partner, I would not have lied, because I would have faith that a DECENT partner - unlike a delusional, dimwitted, piece of trash GIBBO robot - would not be so blindingly, offensively STUPID as to make an UNPREPARED Blackwood bid. Note also that this very hand illustrates EXACTLY why the "1430" Blackwood response structure is VASTLY superior to the hopeless, ANTIQUATED "0314" nonsense that GIBBO is ignorant and old-fashioned enough to FOIST on its users. GIBBO stinks.
5NT: Let's continue our tour through the sick, twisted, perverse labyrinth of GIBBO's "thinking". Given that I purposely LIED (and you can see from the preceding paragraphs exactly WHY I lied, playing with a braindead GIBBO imbecile as my "partner"!), Superstooge now thinks that I have zero or three keys, which is what my untruthful (but VERY well-reasoned) 5C response showed. He himself has two keys (plus - PERVERSELY, given his ridiculous Blackwood bid - a heart void). 5NT asks for specific kings...BUT...since our agreed suit is CLUBS, the LOWEST strain of all, IF South has a side king (or kings), it (or they) will obviously be in a higher strain, and he will have to go BEYOND 6C to show it, which COULD be a problem. In fact, he would probably NOT go beyond 6C (and as you will soon see, despite having TWO kings, I did NOT show either - which is apparently FINE with GIBBO, since the GIB definition of my 6C response to 5NT was "No king below clubs (!)", which means that his ludicrous 5NT call would NEVER solicit information about kings anyway! But beyond that issue, let's return to the fact that North assumes (thanks to my purposely false response to 4NT) that I have zero or three keys. If I have zero, we are ALREADY too high, so presumably he is working on the assumption that I have three...or else he would PASS 5C! But if I do have three, it's pointless for him to ask for kings. Why? Because for sure we will have no club (trump) losers in our known fit of at least 11 cards with his KING and my presumed ace. We will have no heart losers, because he is void. We will have no DIAMOND losers because my presumed ace will cover ONE of his two diamonds and my presumed HEART ace will cover his other diamond. We might POSSIBLY have a THIRD-round spade loser, but at this elevated level of the auction, and with GIBBO's antiquated, inept, PRIMITIVE bidding system, 5NT will NOT provide any elucidation on the subject...so...if he's playing me for ZERO keys he should PASS 5C, and if he's playing me for THREE, he might as well just leap to 7C and hope that there is no spade loser. Thus, his 5NT call is useless.
6C : Despite having TWO kings, I very wisely bid (only!) 6C. Note that from North's perspective, thinking that I had zero or three keys, we might STILL be cold for a grand, but NOW he passed. That was GOOD news, but it was also inconsistent with his 5NT call.
6C was, of course, cold...but ONLY because I had the "right" ace, diamonds, not hearts!
GIBBO rots.
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#2217
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Posted Today, 11:40
North's PASS (!) of my support double certainly worked out well, as we scored a shared top of 92.86 % on the board, but it was still a STRANGE pass!
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https://www.bridgeba...HQ%7Cpc%7CH8%7C
#2218
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- Joined: 2022-July-07
Posted Today, 12:15
These disgusting GIBBO robots NEVER cease to amaze...and the amazement is NEVER because they did something GOOD. They are pitiful. Here's a typical laugher. In this post (# 2218) I will discuss what happened at my table, and in the following post (# 2219) I will show what happened with the same board at a different table.
North's redouble, as defined by GIB, says "...opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT".
North's double of 2C is described as "Penalty" (which makes perfect sense) and also again says "opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT". Great! Consistency...for ONCE with GIB/GIBBO.
Over North's PENALTY double of West's 2C, East RUNS to 2H. South passes. West passes, and...
North...PASSES! What the HELL happened to "opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT"? What the HELL happened?
Furthermore, note that North was THRILLED to make a PENALTY double of 2C with his measly little Q74, but was obviously TERRIFIED to make a penalty double of two hearts with his...KJ875 (!)...SO terrified that he DISOBEYED his own GIB directive that "opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT" !
Is there EVER even a SMIDGEN of logic to ANYTHING these sickeningly inept pieces of GIBBO trash do? EVER?
https://www.bridgeba...S9%7Cpc%7CDJ%7C
North's redouble, as defined by GIB, says "...opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT".
North's double of 2C is described as "Penalty" (which makes perfect sense) and also again says "opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT". Great! Consistency...for ONCE with GIB/GIBBO.
Over North's PENALTY double of West's 2C, East RUNS to 2H. South passes. West passes, and...
North...PASSES! What the HELL happened to "opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT"? What the HELL happened?
Furthermore, note that North was THRILLED to make a PENALTY double of 2C with his measly little Q74, but was obviously TERRIFIED to make a penalty double of two hearts with his...KJ875 (!)...SO terrified that he DISOBEYED his own GIB directive that "opponents cannot play undoubled below 2NT" !
Is there EVER even a SMIDGEN of logic to ANYTHING these sickeningly inept pieces of GIBBO trash do? EVER?
https://www.bridgeba...S9%7Cpc%7CDJ%7C
#2219
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- Posts: 2,243
- Joined: 2022-July-07
Posted Today, 12:33
As promised, here's what happened at another table with the same board described in post # 2218 immediately above.
Here, the auction and definitions were identical up to and including East's 2H call. At that point, for Lord knows what reason, the human South bizarrely doubled 2H (!) with his STIFF 6 (!), even though GIB defined his double as "Penalty". So here, for whatever reason, South (admittedly, a human, not a scurrilous GIBBO robot) made a PENALTY double with a stiff 6...yet at my table North (a witless GIBBO trout) was TERRIFIED to double with KJ875!
If any GIBBO robot ever decides to write his autobiography, I would like to suggest a title to him. I am using the opening words of Herman Melville's "Moby Dick" as an inspiration. Rather than "Call me Ishmael", however, I suggest that the spineless GIBBO robot might name his book "Call Me Coward".
Mind you, "Call Me M.O.R.O.N." would also be a wonderfully accurate title for ANY autobiography of ANT GIBBO robot...the lowest of the low, the worst of the worst.
https://www.bridgeba...S2%7Cpc%7CSK%7C
Here, the auction and definitions were identical up to and including East's 2H call. At that point, for Lord knows what reason, the human South bizarrely doubled 2H (!) with his STIFF 6 (!), even though GIB defined his double as "Penalty". So here, for whatever reason, South (admittedly, a human, not a scurrilous GIBBO robot) made a PENALTY double with a stiff 6...yet at my table North (a witless GIBBO trout) was TERRIFIED to double with KJ875!
If any GIBBO robot ever decides to write his autobiography, I would like to suggest a title to him. I am using the opening words of Herman Melville's "Moby Dick" as an inspiration. Rather than "Call me Ishmael", however, I suggest that the spineless GIBBO robot might name his book "Call Me Coward".
Mind you, "Call Me M.O.R.O.N." would also be a wonderfully accurate title for ANY autobiography of ANT GIBBO robot...the lowest of the low, the worst of the worst.
https://www.bridgeba...S2%7Cpc%7CSK%7C
#2220
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- Joined: 2022-July-07
Posted Today, 14:45
OMARHEUM has sent another hand. I was pleased to see this one, because it concerns one of the things that is MOST disgusting about the repulsive, antiquated, unworkable GIBBO joke of a bidding system. It is something I have often railed about. Thanks to OMAR, I now have another opportunity to discuss its OVERWHELMING stupidity. Yes, it's true that just about everything about GIBBO stinks, but this particular area is one that stinks even worse than most.
OMAR writes "I lucked into a score of 91 % on this board. I opened 2C with my strong hand, but North decided that he should be the captain. This was the result at 20 tables, including mine. Others played in various levels of hearts from four through seven, as well as 7S and 7NT."
My comments:
1. Why didn't West double 2C? Oh, perhaps because that would be NORMAL, and GIBBO is definitely NOT normal!
2. The entire GIBBO system stinks. The GIBBO 2C structure stinks. But perhaps the worst part of the stinking GIBBO 2C structure is its ridiculously stupid use of 2NT as a response to 2C. Who in the WORLD thought this was a good use for the 2NT response? I will now examine the ENORMITY of the gross I.D.I.O.C.Y. of the 2NT response that for some unknown reason, SOMEONE actually thought was a GOOD idea. I will begin by damning the 2NT response structure in GENERAL and after that I will comment on this PARTICULAR auction that took place at OMAR'S table.
3. 2NT is STUPIDLY (what else?) defined by GIB as "Positive no trump - 2-5 clubs; 2-5 diamonds; 2-4 hearts; 2-4 spades; 8+ HCP".
4. This pathetic definition tells us NOTHING useful. North MIGHT have as few as two cards in each suit, but he also MIGHT have up to FOUR cards in each major...or up to FIVE in each minor. This is vague, useless, and tells us NOTHING of importance about ANY suit.
5. North has at least 8 HCP. Wowee zowee - who CARES? WHAT are his points? WHERE are his points? How MANY points does he have? We DON'T KNOW, because the definition doesn't tell us. It is LAZY. His points are lazily, sloppily, vaguely, and FAR too broadly described as "8+", which literally means 8-37, since NO upper limit is provided.
6. The 2NT response has WASTED the ENTIRE two-level that COULD have otherwise been occupied with a USEFUL scientific exchange of actual information.
7. By North, the WEAKER of the two hands, bidding 2NT, the possibility of the hand being wrong-sided IMMEDIATELY arises.
8. By North bidding 2NT, he is - as OMAR noted - effectively making HIMSELF, rather than the BIG hand (which KNOWS WHY it opened 2C!) the captain, which is downright stupid.
9. By bidding 2NT, North makes it MUCH harder for NS to find any potential 4-4 major fits, and indeed ANY fits PERIOD!
10. On the hand in question, North has J9 doubleton in hearts. Looking ONLY at his own hand, why would HE want to declare a no trump contract from HIS side with a "stopper" of J9 dub? Isn't it likely - sight unseen - that it would be preferable for partner to declare, given that partner probably has 20+ HCP?
11. On the hand in question, North has 1065 of clubs. Looking ONLY at his own hand, why would HE want to declare a no trump contract from HIS side with a "stopper" of 1065? Isn't it likely - sight unseen - that it would be preferable for partner to declare, given that partner probably has 20+ HCP?
12. On the hand in question, North has the Q1097 of spades. If the 2C opener also happens to have four spades, that could be their best fit...but jamming the auction with the ridiculous 2NT bid will make it much harder to locate the fit.
13. On the hand in question, South bids 3H, and North, who knows NOTHING about South's hand except that it has, according to the GIB definition, "5+ hearts; 19+ HCP; 23+ total points". That's it, that's ALL! North knows NOTHING beyond that...and even part of THAT is TOTALLY useless (the part about "total" points) because GIB has REPEATEDLY shown that it knows NOTHING about "total" points. Yet he now feels completely comfortable in ARBITRARILLY, UNILATERALLY, and COMPLETELY UNSCIENTIFICALLY...LEAPING (!) to 6NT, thereby WASTING...ANOTHER three levels of potentially useful bidding space!
14. Maybe his IMBECILIC jump will MAGUCALLY land them in a perfect spot, but if 6NT happens to be the perfect spot, it will be PURELY by accident and it would have undoubtedly been reached on a SANE auction anyway, so EVEN if it LUCKILY and MAGICALLY gets to the ideal spot, it will have gained NOTHING. It will merely have broken even with a SANE auction. BUT...
15. If 6NT is NOT the ideal spot (and why the HELL should it be, given that it was just a completely unscientific GUESS?), then the M.O.R.O.N.I.C. leap will probably COST!
16. On top of everything else, North is telling his "partner" - the one with the BIG hand, the one who SHOULD have been the captain right from the start - NOTHING useful. In fact, he is actually MISLEADING his "partner" with a barefaced and ridiculously stupid LIE, because the GIB definition of 6NT claims that it shows :"14-16 HCP", yet the GIBBO dirtbag in the North actually has only...ELEVEN (!) - THREE fewer than his "promised" MINIMUM...and a full FIVE (!) fewer than his "promised" potential maximum. Oh yeah, REALLY good idea to LIE to your "partner" in a SLAM auction - utterly BRILLIANT...and especially after TWICE JAMMING the auction, first by wasting the entire two level with the imbecilic 2NT call (RECOMMENDED, please note, by GIBBO itself - which shows you how absolutely pathetic GIBBO is) and then by wasting EVERY SINGLE CALL between three hearts and six no trump with the INSANE, undisciplined, SELFISH leap to 6NT.
17. If 6NT happens to be "right", then bravo, North. Maybe you'll feel very PROUD that your I.D.I.O.T.I.C. bid LUCKILY got you to a good spot. But what if it didn't? And it RATES not to work! What if you have no play for ANY slam and should have successfully stopped at a lower level? Or what if you're ice cold for a grand but missed it because you ate up ALL the bidding space and had no chance to find it? Or what if you're cold for a slam - maybe even a grand - in a suit but have NO PLAY in no trump and go down?
18. At least your "partner" bid HEARTS, so maybe your J9 dub is no longer a no trump worry, but what about CLUBS, where your "stopper" is STILL only 1065. Will you be happy if, before pard lays down his dummy, you see East table a CLUB as his opening lead? At THAT point, will you still think that you bid the hand perfectly? In FACT...
19. HAD East led a CLUB, the "brilliant" 6NT contract would have...gone down...FOUR (!) tricks...on the FLY...as EW would have taken the first FIVE club tricks! And you know what? I think that...
20. East SHOULD have led a club. No, he wouldn't know that he would be taking FIVE tricks against an absolute M.O.R.O.N. who had bid the hand absolutely M.O.R.O.N.I.C.A.L.L.Y in an absolutely M.O.R.O.N.I.C. system (the repulsive GIBBO), but he WOULD know that he would be taking at least ONE trick - in a MATCHPOINT game, where ONE trick can be VERY valuable - against a SLAM that had been CONFIDENTLY bid in a POWER auction. Note that when he didn't cash his ace, NS had ALL the tricks, so EVEN if on a slightly different layout EW couldn't take FIVE club tricks on the fly, they would at least get ONE...and they would outscore any EW pairs who FAILED to take their ONE trick.
21. OMAR was indeed VERY lucky to get a good score on this hand. His PARTNERSHIP deserved a complete zero (not through any fault of OMAR's, but because the GIBBO system is pure garbage and OMAR's "partner" was a typical GIBBO imbecile). VERY luckily for OMAR, though, there was also a GIBBO robot on lead, and like ALL of his GIBBO brethren, he too is and was one of the worst "bridge players" in the history of the universe and FAILED (as these nauseating GIBBO slimebags so often do) to find the OBVIOUS lead. Why do the powers that be still have GIBBO robots polluting and contaminating its otherwise fine bridge site?
https://www.bridgeba...D7%7Cmc%7C13%7C
OMAR writes "I lucked into a score of 91 % on this board. I opened 2C with my strong hand, but North decided that he should be the captain. This was the result at 20 tables, including mine. Others played in various levels of hearts from four through seven, as well as 7S and 7NT."
My comments:
1. Why didn't West double 2C? Oh, perhaps because that would be NORMAL, and GIBBO is definitely NOT normal!
2. The entire GIBBO system stinks. The GIBBO 2C structure stinks. But perhaps the worst part of the stinking GIBBO 2C structure is its ridiculously stupid use of 2NT as a response to 2C. Who in the WORLD thought this was a good use for the 2NT response? I will now examine the ENORMITY of the gross I.D.I.O.C.Y. of the 2NT response that for some unknown reason, SOMEONE actually thought was a GOOD idea. I will begin by damning the 2NT response structure in GENERAL and after that I will comment on this PARTICULAR auction that took place at OMAR'S table.
3. 2NT is STUPIDLY (what else?) defined by GIB as "Positive no trump - 2-5 clubs; 2-5 diamonds; 2-4 hearts; 2-4 spades; 8+ HCP".
4. This pathetic definition tells us NOTHING useful. North MIGHT have as few as two cards in each suit, but he also MIGHT have up to FOUR cards in each major...or up to FIVE in each minor. This is vague, useless, and tells us NOTHING of importance about ANY suit.
5. North has at least 8 HCP. Wowee zowee - who CARES? WHAT are his points? WHERE are his points? How MANY points does he have? We DON'T KNOW, because the definition doesn't tell us. It is LAZY. His points are lazily, sloppily, vaguely, and FAR too broadly described as "8+", which literally means 8-37, since NO upper limit is provided.
6. The 2NT response has WASTED the ENTIRE two-level that COULD have otherwise been occupied with a USEFUL scientific exchange of actual information.
7. By North, the WEAKER of the two hands, bidding 2NT, the possibility of the hand being wrong-sided IMMEDIATELY arises.
8. By North bidding 2NT, he is - as OMAR noted - effectively making HIMSELF, rather than the BIG hand (which KNOWS WHY it opened 2C!) the captain, which is downright stupid.
9. By bidding 2NT, North makes it MUCH harder for NS to find any potential 4-4 major fits, and indeed ANY fits PERIOD!
10. On the hand in question, North has J9 doubleton in hearts. Looking ONLY at his own hand, why would HE want to declare a no trump contract from HIS side with a "stopper" of J9 dub? Isn't it likely - sight unseen - that it would be preferable for partner to declare, given that partner probably has 20+ HCP?
11. On the hand in question, North has 1065 of clubs. Looking ONLY at his own hand, why would HE want to declare a no trump contract from HIS side with a "stopper" of 1065? Isn't it likely - sight unseen - that it would be preferable for partner to declare, given that partner probably has 20+ HCP?
12. On the hand in question, North has the Q1097 of spades. If the 2C opener also happens to have four spades, that could be their best fit...but jamming the auction with the ridiculous 2NT bid will make it much harder to locate the fit.
13. On the hand in question, South bids 3H, and North, who knows NOTHING about South's hand except that it has, according to the GIB definition, "5+ hearts; 19+ HCP; 23+ total points". That's it, that's ALL! North knows NOTHING beyond that...and even part of THAT is TOTALLY useless (the part about "total" points) because GIB has REPEATEDLY shown that it knows NOTHING about "total" points. Yet he now feels completely comfortable in ARBITRARILLY, UNILATERALLY, and COMPLETELY UNSCIENTIFICALLY...LEAPING (!) to 6NT, thereby WASTING...ANOTHER three levels of potentially useful bidding space!
14. Maybe his IMBECILIC jump will MAGUCALLY land them in a perfect spot, but if 6NT happens to be the perfect spot, it will be PURELY by accident and it would have undoubtedly been reached on a SANE auction anyway, so EVEN if it LUCKILY and MAGICALLY gets to the ideal spot, it will have gained NOTHING. It will merely have broken even with a SANE auction. BUT...
15. If 6NT is NOT the ideal spot (and why the HELL should it be, given that it was just a completely unscientific GUESS?), then the M.O.R.O.N.I.C. leap will probably COST!
16. On top of everything else, North is telling his "partner" - the one with the BIG hand, the one who SHOULD have been the captain right from the start - NOTHING useful. In fact, he is actually MISLEADING his "partner" with a barefaced and ridiculously stupid LIE, because the GIB definition of 6NT claims that it shows :"14-16 HCP", yet the GIBBO dirtbag in the North actually has only...ELEVEN (!) - THREE fewer than his "promised" MINIMUM...and a full FIVE (!) fewer than his "promised" potential maximum. Oh yeah, REALLY good idea to LIE to your "partner" in a SLAM auction - utterly BRILLIANT...and especially after TWICE JAMMING the auction, first by wasting the entire two level with the imbecilic 2NT call (RECOMMENDED, please note, by GIBBO itself - which shows you how absolutely pathetic GIBBO is) and then by wasting EVERY SINGLE CALL between three hearts and six no trump with the INSANE, undisciplined, SELFISH leap to 6NT.
17. If 6NT happens to be "right", then bravo, North. Maybe you'll feel very PROUD that your I.D.I.O.T.I.C. bid LUCKILY got you to a good spot. But what if it didn't? And it RATES not to work! What if you have no play for ANY slam and should have successfully stopped at a lower level? Or what if you're ice cold for a grand but missed it because you ate up ALL the bidding space and had no chance to find it? Or what if you're cold for a slam - maybe even a grand - in a suit but have NO PLAY in no trump and go down?
18. At least your "partner" bid HEARTS, so maybe your J9 dub is no longer a no trump worry, but what about CLUBS, where your "stopper" is STILL only 1065. Will you be happy if, before pard lays down his dummy, you see East table a CLUB as his opening lead? At THAT point, will you still think that you bid the hand perfectly? In FACT...
19. HAD East led a CLUB, the "brilliant" 6NT contract would have...gone down...FOUR (!) tricks...on the FLY...as EW would have taken the first FIVE club tricks! And you know what? I think that...
20. East SHOULD have led a club. No, he wouldn't know that he would be taking FIVE tricks against an absolute M.O.R.O.N. who had bid the hand absolutely M.O.R.O.N.I.C.A.L.L.Y in an absolutely M.O.R.O.N.I.C. system (the repulsive GIBBO), but he WOULD know that he would be taking at least ONE trick - in a MATCHPOINT game, where ONE trick can be VERY valuable - against a SLAM that had been CONFIDENTLY bid in a POWER auction. Note that when he didn't cash his ace, NS had ALL the tricks, so EVEN if on a slightly different layout EW couldn't take FIVE club tricks on the fly, they would at least get ONE...and they would outscore any EW pairs who FAILED to take their ONE trick.
21. OMAR was indeed VERY lucky to get a good score on this hand. His PARTNERSHIP deserved a complete zero (not through any fault of OMAR's, but because the GIBBO system is pure garbage and OMAR's "partner" was a typical GIBBO imbecile). VERY luckily for OMAR, though, there was also a GIBBO robot on lead, and like ALL of his GIBBO brethren, he too is and was one of the worst "bridge players" in the history of the universe and FAILED (as these nauseating GIBBO slimebags so often do) to find the OBVIOUS lead. Why do the powers that be still have GIBBO robots polluting and contaminating its otherwise fine bridge site?
https://www.bridgeba...D7%7Cmc%7C13%7C